PaZza RagaZza

Snapple Cap

2009-12-13T22:44:00.003-04:00

It had been a while since the family had gone out for dinner. My mom is an amazing cook. Not just because she's italian but because she's actually really good! One night she decided to give herself a break and so we all went to the local pizzeria. Me, my parents and my younger brother. The parents each order a coke and us "kids" each get a bottle of Snapple Tea. I immediately turn the top around to read my interesting Snapple fact and the whole table "oohs and aaahs" and let's the fact sink in. A little while later, my mom turns over her bottle top and starts squinting and turning the top upside-down...

"Ma," I say, "What are you doin?"
"I can't read anything."
"Read what?"
She's got this disappointed look on her face.
"Where's my fact? This one didn't get one..."
"Ma... that's because it's a COKE bottle."
"Ooooooh..."

Dai che sei alla fine!!

2008-04-27T15:52:00.002-03:00

i'm not one with words and i think God gets the point. -nuff said.

studying with an earful

2008-04-03T15:29:00.005-03:00

Do i need an iPod to admit me into the library?? It seems everyone I see has these little buds in their ears with white strings dangling from their heads over their sweaters. I can understand attempting to block out any distracting noises around you like people chatting or walking passed you but can someone please explain how the music itself isn't a distraction? Then whenever I ask someone politely to please lower the volume because I can hear their music from 10 feet away, they look at me as if I just asked them for $100!!!! Hmmm... I'm sorry for thinking a library was a place to study!! Imagine where I got that idea?

Seriously, it's my last semester. I have 40 days left in this institution and I'm trying to balance my job, my new apartment (with get this: 3 other roommies), as well as trying to catch up with my research and studying for exams. I couldn't even hold down a relationship with a man even if I wanted to at this point. Contrary to popular belief, I wasn't born a genius. So I would think coming to the library is a decent place to get my work done.

I find myself praying for a small tiny room in a small tiny house in a small tiny village, far far away with nothing but a desk and a chair by an open window. Then, just maybe, I can sit down and collect my thoughts while the sweet sea breeze blows in and get something done without people bothering me!!

It's seems hopeless!

Right now, I need a miracle... St. Jude, can you hear me??!

A new outlook

2008-03-25T12:11:00.003-03:00

The death of Chiara Lubich has been a hard one to swallow, in all honesty. The woman changed the outlook of many people she met... as well as those she didn't. Fortunately, her message will continue to move on through those committed to doing so...

It's been driving me crazy seeing the newspapers covered with scandalous news of our governor's affair and any other smut that is considered "news" ... it's sad that there are so many more important things that aren't given any attention to. Over in Europe, Chiara Lubich's name is popping up in places and here - all i hear is the name Elliot Spitzer. It makes me want to jump up and do something and let people in on something way more important.

At Chiara's funeral in the Basilica last Tuesday, a friend of mine was able to read an intention:

"For us young people, so that we, like Chiara and her first companions, may choose God as our Ideal and making our life become a divine adventure, be builders of a united world."

It's not just a prayer, it's a committment. To be responsible young adults is to promote a better future for ourselves and the next generation. It's not something just one person can do but together - we can unite and make the right choices to "fight" for social change. I think at times it can be difficult to take courage and nourish ourselves with the will of God rather than the will imposed on us by social norms or currents.

The following post was written back when I returned from Argentina in July. I never posted it for some reason but now I feel it's important to share a bit more of myself in this moment.

July 2007

Agora estou de volta a vida simples que Deus me deu... back to the simple life that God gave me. This PanAmerican Congress in Argentina was an esperienza INDIMENTICABILE. I'm so convinced that it was unforgettable, that I didn't even take any pictures. Not a single one. I had brought along a digital camera but the battery was low. So I had to charge it. Fine. I had the charger and therefore, I thought I was prepared. Only thing is - they have silly plugs in other countries...how did I overlook that?? So - no camera. I could have very well purchased a disposable camera but sometimes, pictures just don't do a scene justice.
My family finds it hard to believe that my first time in Argentina, I didn't take pictures. I didn't even buy anything. NOTHING. Not a souvenir, not even a STEAK... what in the world was I thinking??? Looks like I'll just have to go back again someday and do it right.

I was able to see old friends as well as meet many other young people with the same hopeful desires to make a difference... For the first time within the Focolare Movement, all of the americas were joined together. Representatives from Canada to Tierra del Fuego were able to participate...the whole conference was full of contagious joy!

I stayed 3 hours from Buenos Aires in a quaint little town in the country... Un pequeño pueblo que vive por la unidad. The first day I was there, it snowed. Did I mention it hadn't snowed there in 30 something years? Clearly, it was a sign that something historic was about to take place. It was a light snowfall and by the next day all traces of it had gone away. But it was special to see so much joy on my friends' faces...some of whom had never seen snow in all their lives. The littlest thing that I took for granted...snow...go figure! But like each snow flake has got it's own intricate design, so did everyone present at the congress.

We were people of different regions in different countries that have different social structures and governments and what not...yet for that week - we were all together as ONE. Through music, artistic expression and cultural activities, we found ourselves to be a part of one big family, as brothers and sisters!

It was such a grace to be with people who share the same ideas and values...Initially, it was a bit nerve-racking. It was hard for me to get into the swing of things. I had to step outside myself and offer everything up in order to be open to all the things around me.

Watching the presentations of each zone, I was able to take a glance into the vita gen of various countries. To witness their triumphs and struggles was an even bigger push for me to get working in my own community.

I love this feeling...this "high" that I'm 0n. People try and bring me down and I always wonder WHY? Why do they have to ruin this feeling? They think I see the world through rose colored glasses. But I'm not naive - the good is there - i've SEEN IT.

I've returned from Argentina fully recharged and ready to conquer the world with a positive outlook. :) I'll keep it up for as long as it takes but I know I can't do it alone.

It's hard not to get bitter at the world sometimes with how people are treating one another, wars, poverty, inequality....that is clearly present and yeah, it hurts to look at. But thankfully, there's hope. If you believe things will never change, you're right. They won't. As long as that is the only reality you let yourself know, than things will not change. We have to step up and LOVE. That is the only reality worth living for. Sempre piú avanti...dobbiamo conquistare il mondo...

http://www.focolare.org/
- check it out.

"St. Anthony, St. Anthony"

2008-03-05T13:05:00.000-04:00

...please come around. Something is lost and cannot be found." I can't tell you how often I used to repeat that phrase to myself. Normally, one would use it in those insane moments where they're trying to get to an interview and suddenly realize they have no idea where their keys are. Or they're missing their passport two days before an international flight...

(all things which have happened to me by the way)

It seems somewhere along the way though, things went missing. BIG things, like altruism and plain old courtesy. They're still around though. I've felt it and seen it on many occassions. It'd just be nice if it comes around more often.

Eat your heart out bon-bons!

2008-02-26T17:39:00.015-04:00

i don't understand why there's this huge gap between this sentence and the rest of m post...my computer seems to be moody at the moment. my apologies.

By now, some of you may know that I lived in a small tuscan village (which I still continue to dream about) and met a whole slew of amazing people from all walks of life and different countries. Among the many types of cultures I was introduced to, was the brasilian...Go figure!

I moved to Italy and fell in love with Brasil... oh the irony!

A few weeks ago, a friend of mine who is up from Brasil (she's interning at the U.N) came over for dinner and made these bon-bon looking things.

Guardate la foto:
Sapete che cos'é? Queste cose sono brigadeiro--> e non c'é niente sulla terra che mi piace di piú! (aspetta...forse pancakes...)
Anyhoo, God bless brasilian desserts! God bless Brasil, period. Saró felice se mangio solo brigadeiro per il resto della mia vita. E verdade!!! I'll be happy to eat nothing but this stuff for the REST OF MY LIFE.
I don't normally post recipes, in fact, this is the first time and probably the last. But these are so deliciously yummy that I simply had to spread the word.
It's so easy and yummy and did I mention EASY?? Dude, I don't care if it's Lent and you gave up chocolate. Trust me on this one okay? God won't mind one bit!

recipe:
1 can sweetened condensed milk -- (395g)
3 tablespoons cocoa powder
1 tablespoon butter -- soft
1 package chocolate sprinkles

In a heavy saucepan, mix the milk, cocoa and butter. Stir to dissolve the chocolate. Put over low heat and stir constantly with a wooden spoon. Continue stirring and cooking until you are able to see the bottom of the pot when you tilt the pan(the mixture will just slide quickly). This should take 10-12 minutes. Transfer to a greased plate. Let cool. Butter your hands and roll the mixture into small balls and roll over the chocolate sprinkles.

and now...EAT THEM (and thank your lucky stars for the brasilian army brigadier with tall, dark and handsome features and blue eyes it was named after)
enjoy.

Random little things about me.

2008-02-25T18:25:00.004-04:00

-i think those parking spots for pregnant women are just bogusly ridiculous. I park there all the time.
-i hate cotton candy.
-i LOVE climbing stairs.
-i sing along to the radio in the car and don't care who's listening.
-my pet peeve is bad singers in church.
-i think God is totally cool!
-i eat at McDonald's about 3 or 4 times a year. my guilty pleasure is chicken McNuggets.
-i randomly burst out into songs.
-i used to be obsessed with kitchen and bathroom floorplans.
-if i ever have a daughter, i would probably name her "Olive".
-i get pulled over by the police more times than i care to remember.
-i can eat pancakes for breakfast, lunch, and dinner.
-i have the best room mates ever. don't be jealous.

Where's the love?

2008-02-11T13:27:00.000-04:00

Yes. I am alive. Although i haven't written on this blog for what seems like ages... and in fact, it HAS been... I am still here, very much alive. I've kept busy with moving into a new apartment, getting a promotion at work, and continuing my studies in the meantime at a local university. I've been through ups and downs these past few months - various times where I've questioned my faith, fought with my family and tried not to lose total self control... and each time was an opportunity that gave me a greater understanding of what it means to love.
***

I am typing up an email trying to respond to one of the 87 pieces of mail written to me by my family from nearly every country I can think of... and then I looked up and was overcome with this complete sadness. and so I decided to write out some of my thoughts because I didn't know what else to do. I began this blog sitting in this very library one day when I was feeling very VERY frustrated, and it doesn't surprise me that it took another stirring up of my soul to write things down again.

I'm at the university library at the moment surrounded by the hustle and bustle of the student crowd on their lunch breaks coming in and out trying to print out their papers for their next class or check their webpages, etc. and no one seems to notice one another. Their eyes glaze over as they walk - almost as if they were zombies. Do they realize they're surrounded by people...by LIFE?? Or are they in their own individual worlds where not much else seems to matter?? And so I wonder...Doesn't anybody recognize Jesus anymore?!

blog updated.

2007-10-03T23:24:00.000-03:00

i think after a while of not writing, i figure what in the heck am I going to write about now? ... My dear friend in Sydney keeps reminding me to update this thing... that day will come soon, but in the mean time... i'm alive and well and living the word!
peace out peoples!

1.

Friday's Photo: Costa Rican Sunset

2007-08-17T10:36:00.000-03:00

My father took this picture the day I left, so technically, I didn't see this magnificent sunset. My parents were waiting to watch the sunset from the resort restaurant's balcony and there were too many clouds out... how unfortunate eh? Gosh I was so sorry I missed this one! But I figured who wouldn't enjoy a good pic of a Central American, Pacific side sunset?

WEDDING PHOTOS!

2007-08-11T22:03:00.000-03:00

Mentre stavamo preparando l'ultime cose per la ceremonia quella mattina...

gli uomini stavano giocando calcio sulla spiaggia... it figures!

Anyhoo, presenting... THE GLAM SQUAD (made in South Africa, Philippines, & USA)

THE ALTAR

THE WALK (arm & arm with her two older brothers)

THE KISS!!!!!!!!!!!!

THE MR. & MRS...

Yep, they'll have GORGEOUS kids someday...

They are without a doubt, the most loving couple I know. I wish everyone could be this lucky and know what a love like this is. I hope someday to know that kind of love too! Honestly, it brings me such joy to know that this love exists!

Granted, many of you may not know these people personally, but who DOESN'T like looking at happy photos???

Have a nice day folks!

Friday's Photo: Why I walk...

2007-08-10T22:51:00.000-03:00

I'm not so good at math...that's why I walk. I do not like taxis, nor will I ever. Even if they're free. I like to walk around aimlessly and take in all the city has to offer me instead.

How is anyone supposed to figure out all of this price chart anyways? All I know is that it's worth walking 40 blocks rather than weave in and out of traffic in some smelly old cab with someone who barely speaks my language.

Did you know there are TV's in the cabs now? I had no idea. I took a taxi a few weeks ago when I got back from Argentina and there it was...staring me right in the face. A freegin TV. Is that really necessary? Can't I go anywhere without being bothered with information on Lindsay Lohan or Pariggi Hilton?

Vacation after-math

2007-08-09T22:42:00.000-03:00

Relaxing poolside in Costa Rica, reading Harry Potter.

Ok let's see, how can i put this? You know when you have a seriously relaxing vacation and you're happy as can be but then you return home and are running around like a chicken with no head going crazy?? That's me.

I arrived early in the morning from Costa Rica and was at work that same morning - all day. I'm dead tired. My cell phone is on OFF (for as long as I can take it) ...

I'm trying to throw myself back into the present moment...ci vuole un po di tempo per realizzare che non sono piu in Costa Rica, ma in NY.

Il matrimonio era bellissima. The bilingual ceremony (Spanish/English) was right on the beach overlooking the calm waters of the bay. The bride looked like an angel! Almost everyone, including the bride, kept their cool through the whole ceremony - except me - ho pianto durante la ceremonia like an idiot. Ero molto emozionata! huahahaa... ma va bene - era feliz!

*I'll post more pictures as soon as I get them!

Niagra Falls

2007-07-30T22:59:00.000-03:00

My family is visiting from Italy - e voi pensate che IO? sono pazza? Mamma mia, la mia casa e toda uma bagunca agora! Stanno mangiando tutte cose! Ma, e cosi la vita italiana... mangiano, parlano, mangiano ancora...e giocano le carte! ...just kidding...sorta.

Comunque, la mia famiglia mai hanno visitato Niagra falls. Per qui non sá -(Niagra divides New York and Canada)... e sono le cascate piu alto nel mondo- secondo me---

Anche se sono andata tante volte, God's ability to make something so beautiful still amazes me...I adore rainbows...

Ricominciare

2007-07-29T10:21:00.000-03:00

Forse era questa sfida che ieri e' stato bello. ... vai VIA uomo vecchio! Provo di fare la brava. 1

una Sfida d'Amare G.A

2007-07-29T01:33:00.000-03:00

Oggi e' stato un giorno bellissimo. ERA...a l'ultimo momento Dio mi ha dato una grande sfida e non riuscivo a farla. Adesso ho una voglia di gridare, ma non ho piú la energia. Mi sento proprio giú e giá lo so che cosa devo fare ma e molto difficile. Non c'e nessuno in la casa... qui posso amare? e' Lui. Sí, devo sceglierLo pero in questo momento voglio rimanere da sola. Pero Lui non mi lascia mai! aiutooooooo... Ho perso.

HARRY POTTER MANIA

2007-07-28T11:02:00.000-03:00

I think I just pulled a muscle from pickin up the latest version of Harry Potter. 759 pages - Seven-hundred and fifty-nine pages... what 8 year old can read all that? Ok, maybe I'm being dramatic. I think it's great that kids are reading since it seems it's become more of a past time with all the video/computer games that are offered as other ways to kill time.

But it's the freegin size of the Bible. Did I just use the word "freegin" and "bible" in the same sentence? (Sorry God!) Maybe it's more like all of Shakespeare's works combined. Either way - you get the idea. You can't really tell but - I'm a Harry Potter fan. Not a big enough fan to dress up and wait on line for HOURS the night before the book is released but a big enough fan to buy all seven books and enjoy them...

I was watching the news reports on this Harry Potter mania and they interviewed one 16 year old girl who had flown out with her friend from California to wait on line at a bookstore in NY, just so she can have the book 3 hours earlier than her friends back home.... umm... WHAT? In cases like this I want to speak to that girl's mother and father. Is that really necessary? You don't find that your daughter has freakishly obsessive behaviors and some issues if she HAS to have her hands on that book so badly that you're willing to pay hundreds of dollars to fly her out to New York? No, on second thought, maybe I'd like to speak to THEIR parents.

My goodness - this last one is enormous. I can't carry this thing around with me! I can't just pop it in my bag on my way out the door or read it on the train, etc... I suppose I can read a few pages before bed but it will take me a long time to finish it and I'm not so sure I want to invest in all that time with Harry Potter when there are so many other books out there that I'd rather read. So...... what to do with that book?

Friday's Photo: Union Square

2007-07-27T10:54:00.000-03:00

As I've mentioned before on this blog, I like to people watch. I enjoy walking through the city and pretend to be all touristy at times taking pictures of random things here and there. I was walking through Union Square when this little girl caught my eye. Not only was she simply adorable because she was dressed pretty outrageously but also because she was just mesmorized by the music that the man was playing. So much so that when he stopped, she ran over and begged him to play more...

My great day

2007-07-27T10:30:00.001-03:00

Yesterday was a good day for me... No, GREAT day
Why, you ask?

1. I found gas for less than $3.00 a gallon. $2.99 in fact. I consider that a miracle.

2. I got a visit from my not-so-nice-friend which under normal circumstances, I'm not happy. But considering I'll be on a beach in Costa Rica in one week, I say - Bring on the muscle aches and back pains!

3. I had the day off which gave me a chance to catch up on my tan that I lost while in Argentina.

4. My favorite yogurt was on sale at the supermarket.

5. I find out that I'll be hosting a Slovakian guy with nice, blue eyes and a killer smile for the next day and a half. So what if I only met him once in Castelgandolfo, and once in Loppiano? We're practically family now right?

6. I found $5.00 in a pair of old jeans...

7.... that I recently fit back into.

Ain't life grand??

What's an american?

2007-07-07T15:27:00.000-03:00

Hey all! I realize i've been M.I.A lately but considering I had been working extra hours (...hello over time pay!) and my computer being busted, there weren't many opportunities for me to write much of anything. Today is an absouletly gorgeous day where I'm at and I was hoping for a little time at the beach but considering I still have to finish laundry and packing there isn't much hope for that.

In less than 12 hours I'll be at JFK watching a slew of people rushing in every direction going to and from wherever they're coming or going. God, how i LOVE airports!

I'll be in Argentina for a week which means pulling out all my sweaters that I already packed away for the summer. I'm real excited to go and most of all to learn - not only improve my spanish but also to hear how things are going on the other side of the world. To meet new and old friends, and realize the concept of North and South America as being one, whole continent...I'm lucky to have had the education I had growing up (my parents did the best they could and I was sent to those ridiculous private schools) but the USA is one of those countries that teaches its children that we are in fact, two SEPERATE continents...NORTH & SOUTH... so right from the start we're set out to think of how completely different we are, rather than focusing on what draws us together as common people...

We learn that Mexico is part of Latin America but scratch our heads like baffled monkeys when asked if it's truly part of North America or not. (The answer is yes people.) Yes, mexico is part of north america. PERIOD. But because of the whole spanish speaking country that lies south of our border thing, we assume it's not. What is America? Who are americans? Let's not forget our dear neighbors to the north... Yes, God bless Canada, eh?! I mean, so what if they add the letter "u" to the words like neighbor, color and honor and switch the "z" to "s" like in "realize" or what not.... Che confusione!

Never in my life have I ever been a patriotic citizen of this country - The good ol' US of A... - I never even owned a flag and I sure as hell would NEVER wave it around in a big piazza anywhere abroad. To this day I'm amazed at how proud Brasilians are to be...well, brasilian!!! Wherever they go it's a guarantee that there will be a lot of blue, yellow and green everywhere - and I truly mean EVERY- freegin -WHERE. I sometimes wonder what that would be like, to love my country that much that I would want to tell the world where I am from...What am I so afraid of? ...errr...

I'm not a hater or anything though. I'm just not particularly proud...at the moment. We're not all pagans who worship BUSH and consumerism...and each country has their own problems too. We're not perfect! There are downright good people in this country and some foreigner don't see that!! ...BUT there are also down right good people in those places where we shouldn't be either....and some people would rather not think about that either...but I'll save that for another time because once I get started on that topic...look out!

There was never a big red,white and blue star spangled banner proudly hanging outside my house. Not even on the 4th of July (our independance day) ... Sure, we celebrated it with a crazy BBQ, but that was for the mere fun of being surrounded by great company and good wine....

Anything "american" was seriously considered to be schifo. The very word, "Americana" was usually preceeded by the word, "Babba" ... Babb'Americana was what I'd hear anytime I did something my parents disapproved of. To even be thought of as american was mostly disrespectful. It meant, ignorant, not knowing, not being bilingual and not knowing anything about geography. So why whenever I'm out of the country do I get all "patriotic"?? Where does this come from??? Isn't it odd that I'd all of the sudden say while out of the country that i'm "american"?? I sometimes amaze myself.

This should be quite an extra-ordinary experience, i think, this going to Argentina for a Panamerican congress.

And this whole "label" of being "American" --- tell that to someone from south or central america... are they not american too? But when I say, "Hi, I'm american" - I don't mean any disrespect to anyone who is from south and central. I don't want to sound like I'm saying "You're NOT american if you're from central and south america" because in fact, they are...very much so...they're just as much american as I am...!!!!!!!

In english, there is no other way to put it though. We say we're "American" because there's not a word for anyone who is from the USA, EUA or whatever. When you're from Italy, you are Italian. Or if you're from Mexico, you're Mexican. In other languages, someone from the USA could say, "Stati Unidense" or something of that nature. But there is no "United States-icans" and America is in our country's name - "united states of america." --- rather than introduce myself as being "American" ... I think i'll just stick with , "Hola, soy de Nueva York" and let them decide what in the heck I am!!!!

Don't worry people, depois ti escreo contando como foi! Knowing me, I'll probably learn more portugues than spanish while I'm down there...vediamo.

See you in a week!

Adios!

Friday's Photo: PEACE

2007-06-29T12:25:00.000-03:00

PAX

I saw this panel of the word "Peace" written in several languages alla entrata de una chiesa famosa in una cittá famosa... - forse, some of you may even recognize it and know che ogni cinque secondi, c'e una dull voce from above saying nothing but "SSshhhh. Silencio." I wonder if it's a recording or an actual man sitting in una stanza con un microfono. Just the thought of it makes me laugh....

I'd go back to this city in a heartbeat. Good times.

Eli + technology = disaster

2007-06-29T11:20:00.000-03:00

Sorry folks! Mio computer e un pezzo di merda e sta faccendo un schiopero. E se como sto lavorando tante ore durante la settimana, non ce l'ho tanto tempo per andare alla biblioteca per leggere emails e fare altre cose. You may not hear from me for a while. Everything having to do with technology has got it in for me... I don't know what I'm going to do without being able to read all your blogs for the next few days.. .. All you guys' blogs got me so bad, I don't even watch General Hospital anymore.

And no more talking on msn o skype with my famiglia mondiale... ERGH!! ok ok... Eli, stay calm. ...

Anyways, try not to miss me so much ok? Hopefully me and my computer will be able to reach some sort of contract agreement over the weekend, but you all know how strikes go...!!

The girl's toy...?

2007-06-22T10:50:00.000-03:00

In recent attempts for one toy company to break out of double standards, they've created a track for little toy cars... for girls. Notice the pretty purple and fuscia-ish tints? It's called, "Polly Wheels Race to the Mall Playset"

Have you rolled your eyes yet? So not only does the track have to be set in "girly" colors (which are all socially constructed because really, what IS a girly color anyways??) but the real kicker is that now it's completely acceptable to have little girls believe they should be "racing" to the mall?

I may be over-reacting. I just remember walking into a gym notoriously known for women, and thinking, "What's with all the pink and purple machines?" For crying out loud, even the towels were pink. I think it's overkill. But that's just me.

Friday's Photo: Troppo carino

2007-06-22T10:35:00.000-03:00

TOO CUTE !

While in Rome, there was a local "movie shoot" of some sorts going on and the director was in need of extras for this one particular scene. He started selecting people from the crowd - not me since I apparently don't have "the look" - Comunque, I totally felt for this kid over on the left side of this picture. You can see all of his friends were pulled for this scene (that's them, sitting on the first step) and he was left out. He didn't even whine, kick or scream. He simply looked on sadly trying to accept that God had other plans for him, I guess. Then eventually, he smiled since he was able to run around and play while his friends had to sit still - in the hot Roman summer sun - waiting until the director finished the scene.

*I just wanted to pick him up, walk him up to the piazza and buy him a gelato!

My Purgatory

2007-06-19T15:55:00.000-03:00

This morning I spent $2.65 on an ice coffee for breakfast on my way to the court house only to be yelled at by the security guard that no food and beverages are permitted beyond the front door. I gulped down as much as I could and cringed as I was throwing away the rest...
After waiting a few hours in a small room with a bunch of other "offenders" I was ready to keel over since I was so famished. Maybe it was all the guilt I had been feeling that was making me sick. I felt like I was in Purgatory or something...well, I was in fact, waiting to be judged now wasn't I? Before you think I've been arrested, I can honestly say I was NOT. ... I talked my way out of it. And "it" isn't something y'all need to know about right now.
But I have one quick question for you folks -
It's not really perjury if I lie in traffic court is it? I mean, it's traffic court. I somehow managed to finagle my way out of a $285 ticket for something that happened in April of 04...that's right, this offense took place 3 stinking years ago- see? I told you people I was a good procrastinator!
After all was said and done, I ended up only paying $35 to lift the suspension on my license and now I can call it a day. So, um...does this mean I'm goin to hell or what?

Friday's Photo: Leaving the nest

2007-06-15T09:03:00.000-03:00

3's a crowd...

A few weeks ago in the spring, my papá had noticed a small nest outside our kitchen window. I'm oblivious to these things and forgot all about the eggs. A while later, he notices how big they are and that today is the day they will fly away. And so I took that as my cue to get out my camera and go all 'national geographic' in my backyard and bird watch about 10 minutes until the mama bird came home. Well, as you can see, it's kind of crammed in the nest and getting these two out was going to take some work. They wouldn't budge. They seemed perfectly content staying home under the protection of mom's wing. Afterall, the world can certainly be a big, scary place.

They finally made it to leave the nest but not without difficulty. One of them crashed right into our window!! Then perched himself on the ledge to most likely get over his splitting headache as well as muster up the courage to give it another go, and then made it off to fly. The second one took a straight nose dive into the grass. The poor thing wobbled around a bit, got a running start and also made it off to fly. It was one of the coolest things I had ever seen. To this day I think of them sometimes when I'm scared of doing something new.

It would be nice to stay all comfy, cozy, in a safe place but at the same time, there's a whole world out there and I want to get to know it. There's always a new adventure on the horizon and we're never quite sure if we should take it, or if our wings would make it that far. I say, go for it. And if you're headed for a nose dive...shit happens. Wobble around a bit, get a running start, and then try again!

DAY into NIGHT

2007-06-14T10:26:00.000-03:00

See that girl in the green leafy dress? She's getting married in just under 50 days. That's right. A mere 7 weeks to go and I'll be standing beside her as her maid of honor watching this girl marry the love of her life on some romantic beach in Costa Rica.

She's my cousin, my "sista", BFF, fellow gen and dog lover - my everything! We've been friends since we were born. Our mom's were best friends and God willing, so will our unborn children and their children. There's one teensy-weensy problemo: I still have yet to buy my plane ticket down there. You would think as the maid of honor I'd be the first one and then call the other bridesmaids to get the ball rolling. But then my reputation for world's biggest procrastinator would be tanked... but all joking aside, I need to get that ticket as of like, 5 weeks ago. I also need to get my dress altered. I can't find a decent pair of shoes to go with the dress and my Zia can't do the alterations without the shoes... so it looks like I better get shopping.

Last weekend was her Bridal Shower - a tradition where all the women who know the bride get to "shower" her with gifts. It wasn't much of a surprise since someone slipped but she pretty much knew she was having one eventually. I then slipped even further and told her the date and everything! She's my best friend!! I tell her EVERYTHING!!! Gosh, I was so annoyed with myself!
Since her other bridesmaid flew out from L.A. and wasn't going to see the bride until Costa Rica, we decided to have an impromptu bachelorette party that same evening as the bridal shower. We called some of our closest friends and went out for a night on the town.

It had been a loooooooong time since I've gone out. I've gone out, but not "Out-out" if you get what I'm saying. My tolerance level is so not what it used to be but I could honestly drink capirinhas all night long if it means getting to see our cute waitor...

I didn't have a pair of clean jeans, and cargo pants just wasn't going to cut it. So I was left with this skirt. The skirt that I wear to the beach and the beach only...Hummmm, so much for that rule! And that pair of black strappy heels somehow managed to make their way to the front of my closet, over all the flip-flops and sneakers. I used to dress like this when I thought I was the coolest 19 year old on the planet but that bitch retired years ago. I haven't dressed like this in years.

I have the greatest city at my fingertips and don't even get out much - I figured, my best friend's bachelorette party would be a good excuse!

We didn't do anything too crazy (we kept it classy...) and could still count to ten by the end of the night, which is always a good sign.

In 20 years I wonder what I'd say while looking back at this photo.

Most likely, "Who in the hell did I think I was walking around like that - on the eve of the Puerto Rican day parade no less!"

All in all, it was a fun night and I was able to spend it with a fantastic group of girls!

We're obsessed with SUSHI

2007-06-14T10:17:00.000-03:00

Friday's Photo: Blessed little fingers

2007-06-08T09:07:00.000-03:00

Blessed little fingers

This photo was taken a while back but it still is worthy of being one of my favorites.

I had gone to my cousin's baptism and the baby was being tossed around like a hot potato because everyone wanted to get their share of holding him. It bothered me a bit but well, he is cute and there are a whole lot of people who love him. The baby was sleeping like a little angelito and had just let out a big yawn and grabbed a hold of his chain with the crucifix.... while everyone was snapping away at the yawn- i went for his tiny fingers... Just knowing that this baby was reaching for the cross when he was all vulnerable and tired put a great smile on my face and joy in my heart. I hope as he grows, he'll continue to reach out for that cross...

2007-06-07T22:48:00.000-03:00

If you want to read something that will really move you

Go here:

www.asianbagunceira.blogspot.com

I'm so lucky to have had this girl by my side in Italy... She now has started a blog herself and is a much better writer than I'll ever be. Her words will move you and inspire you. ... so check it out already! GO!

Argentina!

2007-06-07T10:32:00.000-03:00

Is it Thursday already? See, this is what happens to me in the summer whenever I'm not in classes. I forget what day is what and don't even think about asking me what the date is! But I have some great news...

ARGENTINA, HERE I COME! I need to get ready for work and so I can't write too long, but yeah, I spoke with my boss yesterday and managed to tell her about this once in a lifetime opportunity to go down to Buenos Aires for a Pan-American congress of young adults involved in "Youth for a United World" project. I've been to only two in Rome but this is the first of it's kind, where it's specifically for the continent of America... And so I've been chosen to be sponsered and go down and represent the North-East Zone of the States. People will be coming from all over central and south americas and I'm thinking I'll need to seriously brush up on my spanish since it hasn't been used in SO long. I'll get by with the Italian though, I'm sure. AH! I'm so excited! I thought I'd never get a chance to go and was so scared to tell my parents (although I don't need their permission, it's certainly nice to have their blessing though) ... and I thought they'd flip out on me leaving the country AGAIN... but they seemed real cool with it all. I figured, if it really is God's will for me to go, than nothing can stand in the way of that. And so now we're pulling together the money from the sponsers and let's see if it all works out in time! It's still up in the air right now but at least it's within reach!! I'll keep you informed later but now I'm off to work! Ciao!

Check it out: www.mondounito.net/ENG/iniziative_progetti.htm

*Hope the link works but if it doesn't you can just google "Youth for a United World" (... is google even a verb?) whatever, it is now!

**and don't forget to stop by tomorrow for Friday's Photo!

Fabulous friends

2007-06-05T19:10:00.000-03:00

On days like this I realize how small this world really is. This morning began with reading an email from Elena in Holland, helping me out with a recipe that I am translating for Sheila in Brasil. Followed by a two hour conversation about love, life and lots of laughs with another Eli in Sydney, Australia. After feeling bad about an argument with my mom, a close friend called at the perfect time and listened patiently to me blabbing about what more can I do to be a better person/daughter.... blah blah blah... I then signed onto msn messenger and up popped a box from Carlos in Sao Paolo. He offered some comforting words and made me feel a whole lot better. As I was finishing up my conversation with Carlos, Titsiana in Italy gave me a quick shout out, which made me smile. Then Saxa in Chicago and I talked more about the pressures of entering the real world after college and how our parents aren't exactly the listening type when it comes to our NonProfit endeavors and how we'll change the world someday.... I have high hopes we'll be meeting up in Buenos Aires this summer...

These are all friends I picked up in Italy to add to my collection of fabulous people I know. I was neighbors and room-mates with these people.

...I saw them passing by in the street

...I saw them sitting in the pews at the church

...I saw them playing calcio

...I saw them at the market

...I saw them at work in the factory

...I saw them at dinner time

Each day I pray for them and realize that they're not so far away - they've been with me all along...and on days like this, I feel loved.

Eli saves the day...

2007-06-04T15:12:00.001-03:00

After coming home from my first errand this morning (at 7:30am), I came home to find an enormous puddle of water spreading throughout my kitchen. We've been having disgusting weather lately and there's been nothing but rain in our forecast, unfortunately. I assumed it was due to all the rain... I mopped up the mess, put a load of laundry in the washer and went back to bed. After waking up for the second time, I returned downstairs to see cleaning products that were once under the sink, spread out all over the kitchen floor and my brother eating my left over General Tso's chicken for breakfast at the table looking annoyed and frustrated.

"What's up?" I asked.
He replied, "There was water EVERYWHERE and it's because the pipe is leaking under the sink."
"hmm... " , I said as I knelt down to inspect the leaky pipe.

...indeed, we had a steady stream of water coming out from the pipes. So what does my genius of a baby brother do? He mopped up the mess with a gabillion paper towels -because at 21 years old, he still needs instructions on how to use a freegin mop- and instead of taking an actual bucket and placing it under the sink, he decided to use several tupperware containers to catch the water.

He then proceeds to ask me, "You have the day off today right? Because at this rate, you'll need to empty out these containers at least every 10 minutes."

... like it's my God-given duty as the only girl in the house to save the kitchen from the big bad plumber ghost?
...like he thinks I should sit here and wait for these tiny little things to fill up so I could empty them out again?
... like he couldn't just stop and think for a second and get a bigger bucket instead of 8 little plastic containers?

I was getting more and more annoyed but remained calm and tried to look him in the eye and be patient with him instead of being a jerk of an older sister.
I was still kneeling under the sink and had an "A-Ha!" moment. I reached over and placed my hand on something called a knob. "Righty tighty, lefty lucy" and I turned the knobs to the right. And so, with that, the water was shut off and the leaking stopped.

**
Now all I have to do is clean up this mess in the kitchen, finish the second load of laundry, and charge my phone to full battery power so I'll have enough power on my cell phone to listen to one of my best friends call me to stress about hypothetical major plans to spend a week in Buenos Aires this July...

Friday's Photo: Liquid Sunshine

2007-06-01T08:35:00.000-03:00

LIQUID

SUN

SHINE

I love taking photos. My digital camera is an extention of my right arm. I am not a photographer per se but I like to capture interesting things and show people my perspective. So I'm designating each Friday to a favorite photo of mine.
Here's the first of the series of favorite photos.

While walking home from work on a sunny day, the sky opened up and started to rain a bit. This is Elena from Holland and Sarah from the States reaching out for some unexpected liquid sunshine.

In the distant background, you can see the vineyards we walked through to get to the road leading to our casetta.

This picture makes me smile!

Date night

2007-05-31T10:16:00.000-03:00

I have a date tonight with a blond haired, blue eyed ticklish toddler. My cousin's kid was over a few days ago and asked when I'd be watching "the movie" with him. A while back, I discovered that he must be the only 4 year old I know who has never seen the Pixar movie CARS. So I promised a million years ago that I'd watch it with him... the poor kid has been waiting forever for me to come over. So tonight's the night!!! I'll make a whole theme night out of it... I'll let him drive my car to his nonna's house after the movie. I'm sure his mom will just love me for suggesting it to him. Just kidding. There will be no 3 foot boy driving my car tonight. (His aunt reads this blog so I have to say that!) It's going to be a blast though!

Alphabet Soup

2007-05-30T09:23:00.000-03:00

I'm a new fan of Louise and saw that she did this. I had some time to kill before getting ready for work... so here it goes!

A - Age: 20-something. Old enough to be married with a kid according to several of my zias.
B - Band listening to right now: EVA - some Brasilian band I got hooked on in Italy.
C - Career future: Free lance photographer, blogger, whatever. I like to focus on the present moment and leave it in His hands. (Sociology is a pretty broad major though so who knows.)
D - Dad's name: Giuseppe - I've heard every variation on the pronounciation of this name by so many telemarketers it's not even funny. My poor papá...
E - Easiest person to talk to: Oh, tough one. I have a great group of friends - all of them.
F - Favorite song: I Hope you Dance - LeAnn Womack
G - Gummy Bears or Gummy Worms: I'm all about the Haribold Gummy bears.
H - Hometown: Wherever my heart is...
I - Instruments: piano - 7 years of classical training over a decade ago and I can't even read music anymore (my ma is heartbroken over this) I played the Xylophone for a blink of an eye. I also played the flute for a few months.
J - Job: citizen of the world, daughter, friend, revolutionary thinker. *Free Spirit
K - Kids: someday, God willing.
L - Longest car ride ever: Kentucky Road Trip with Gen, 6 months after getting my license! My mom hid my passport to prevent me from going and although Kentucky may have seemed very much like a different country than New York, I just don't see how NOT having my passport would make a difference. I don't know what in the heck she was thinking..
M - Mom's name: Maria (Yes, my parents' names are Giuseppe e Maria...and NO my brothers' name is NOT Gesú.)
N - Number of people you slept with: I'm not married yet am I?? ... still going strong.
O - Optimum time of day to work: anytime in the a.m.
P - Phobia[s]: falling out of a moving vehicle [did I mention I totally LOVE roller coasters?] and flying over the deep blue sea. [Yet I still manage to travel to Italy several times]
Q - Quote: "You are the salt of the Earth... you are the light of the world." These are the words Pope John Paul II told us at World Youth Day, Toronto. His voice still rings in my ears and resonates in my heart, saying this phrase from the gospel of Matthew [5:13-14]
R - Reason to smile: forgiveness! Don't know where I'd be without it!
S - Song you sang last: White Wedding by Billy Idol. It was just on TV for a wedding dress segment on the morning show.
T - Time you wake up: 7:15am(Monday-Friday) 9:00am Saturday, 8:30am Sunday. There's no such thing as "sleeping in" in a house full of Italians (who swear they don't yell...they're just talking), marble tiles and high ceilings which make it ideal for sound to carry all throughout this fortress of a house.
U - Unknown facts about me: I have a tattoo that my parents don't know about. I'll tell them eventually, someday around NEVER.
I worked at the Container Store for about a year and I am the biggest bagunceira(SLOB) on the planet. I felt like such a fraud.
I am conversational in Italian, French, Spanish, Portuguese and ASL. Whatever random words you find in my blogs they're usually one of these languages. [except the Sign Language of course]
**I'm an international Christian recording star and singer/songwriter. :P
V - Vegetable you hate: funghi - I say I'm allergic to them but I really don't want to be rude to the host / cook.
W - Worst habit: brushing my teeth after everything I eat or drink besides water. My dental hygenist wants to smack me...too much of a good thing is not a good thing people.
X - X-rays you've had: too many to count. If I really have to think about it, more than 5...I'm so accident prone.
Y - Yummy food: stuffed peppers
Z - Zodiac sign: I think I'm the one with the goat.

Ora toca a te!

nostalgia's a killer...

2007-05-28T23:46:00.001-03:00

Aiiii! QUE SAUDADES!!

Remind me why I'm back in the States again?

I took this back in September, I think. I was walking through the hills with friends and this image took my breath away. I had to stop for a photo.

Remember that scene in Mary Poppins when they all step into a chalk-drawn portrait on the sidewalk?

This is how that walk felt like to me. It couldn't have been real. I mean, my gosh, would you LOOK at this?

The prodigal son

2007-05-28T13:12:00.000-03:00

It's been a busy Memorial Day Holiday weekend around here. I've been working at my new job and loving it. My brother came up from Florida (the one who bought the TV on mother's day) to spend time with the family. Oh joy. I can't tell you how excited I was. I was SO . HAPPY.... simply DELIGHTED...ECSTATIC. Am I over doing it just a little??

This man makes a hobby out of making me miserable. I was on my best behavior, was sweet and offered him many things and he was STILL disrespectful to me. I swear, after this weekend I'll be getting a non-stop ticket to heaven!

It's just hilarious when he comes up. You should see my parents. My mom and dad go nuts organizing a party with all these people and the house is all a bagunca each time he's here.

When I came back from Italy, my mom didn't even pull out the good china.

But when HE comes up... it's time to break out the silver!! She even made the man tiramisú for crying out loud.

I need to read up on that Bible story- You all know the one...

and start over BIG TIME because a girl like me can't afford to be grumpy...

What I need...

2007-05-25T09:57:00.001-03:00

I read a few blogs a day here and there...Bleeding espresso's blog - I swear, her blog is just as addictive as espresso itself. I saw this "game" she did and thought, "Eh, what the heck- I'll do it too." It's a fun little way to pass the time.

It's real easy. Just type your first name followed by the word "needs" to see what comes up. I wasn't too satisfied with "Eli needs" results and "Elisa needs" was a bit complicated because ELISA is the name of an HIV test. So here are ten of my favorite results for my full name. (Which only my mother calls me)

[1] Elisabeth needs to be thanked profusely. Starting now.

[2] Elisabeth needs my help on a raid this evening. It‘s just a side thing I do on weekends for a little extra cash.

[3] Elisabeth needs to step away from the tanning bed. ME? I’ve been scared of those things ever since that scene in SCREAM where Jennifer Love Hewitt got trapped inside! I bake the natural way.

[4] Elisabeth needs to not go off on her tangents. I'm sorry, but isn't that what a blog is for?

[5] Elisabeth needs to be serious about her schoolwork. Ok, fine. No more stopping and running off to foreign countries until I graduate!

[6] Elisabeth needs to shop more and talk less. Only if you’re willing to give me your credit card.

[7] Elisabeth needs more life experience and some energy. Oui, c'est vrai. I think a trip to South America would do the trick.

[8] Elisabeth needs to balance her dreamy idealism with temperance and practicality in order to succeed in life. Why do people pay psychiatrists when all their important life questions can be answered right from the web GRATIS?

[9] Elisabeth needs her whiny ass kicked into shape. Ok, you've been talking to my mother haven't you?

[10] Elisabeth needs monetary help to feed her 50 previously homeless dogs having picked them up over the last couple of years. Poppy-cock! She really just needs money to go to Argentina…

Feel free to do this game yourself and then post it back up in my comments because I'd be curious to see it too!

Poor, Little Elisabeth

2007-05-24T10:45:00.000-03:00

73% of Americans disapprove of the Bush administration. Why do we have Bush for president ... STILL? It's a question many americans are continually asking themselves. It's the great American mystery. I found myself in the middle of a few hostile introductions over in Europe when people discovered I was an American. It was automatically assumed that I was a Bush lover and fully supportive for the invasion of Iraq. Little did they know that New Yorkers are the most liberal people in this country.

There are a few Bush lovers around these parts (like my family for instance, but I still manage to love them) but honestly, they're few and far in between. And even those who at first liked Bush, are turning on him. If you do like Bush around here, it's not such a good idea to go around saying it.

Anyhow -

I don't watch The View that often because most of the time it's just a group of women screaming about some nonsense... but I happen to love the drastic difference of perspectives of Rosie and Elisabeth.... especially when it comes to the war on terrorism... I adore Elisabeth because she's a young chica with some traditional values (and she's also got a beautiful name too)...but politcally, I'm not always with her. I'm not such a fan of Rosie but I admit, she entertains me a little. I like to listen to Elisabeth for what she says because she's smart and strong and sticks to her guns...

Here's a prerequisite clip for watching the big blow up argument on the second clip between Elisabeth and Rosie.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I5fRiVTQSaU

I couldn't watch the show yesterday because I was off to work but thank goodness for Youtube!
Enjoy -

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7iEXvOMJL6g

Il mercato & the Peanut Butter Complex

2007-05-23T10:18:00.000-03:00

I'm SO excited! A friend of mine is in town for the week and I haven't seen her since I left Italy a few months ago. She stayed three months longer than I did..because...well, she's cool like that. She's an American too. From Chicago - not as grand as NY of course, but I forgive her.

We don't have to do much to have fun... honestly, just running into the nearest Dunkin Donuts does it for me. Granted, we talked over millions of cups of espresso while over there but it just wasn't the same. I longed for my toasted almond coffee with milk and 2 sugars so much that I found "Sciroppo di latte di mandorla" in the mercato and desperately tried to recreate it. Umm, yeah, not so much. I like the feeling of a big, hot mug in my hand with steam rising up and all. The itty bitty espresso cup just wasn't doing it for me.

Oh, and that's another thing... the market. There is no such thing as a supermarket where I was. Maybe, somewhere in the big city, but even then - COOP doesn't really measure up with Stop & Shop.

The market was walking distance from my casetta. I had to walk past an olive grove and take the shortcut through someone's vineyard to get there. And it had only two aisles. That's right. TWO. The shelves were no higher than five feet tall so everyone was able to see the entire store. There was no overhead cheesy music playing, no "attention shopper" announcements or price check nonsense. They had crazy inconvenient hours like 1-4 monday through wednesday and 12-5 on thursday and friday I think. There was another market in the village but I never went. I had grown kind of fond with this itty bitty one. Even if it was the size of my kitchen in the States. It had everything I needed anyhow. But that was just it - it had the basic necessities and the creamy goodness of Skippy peanut butter and honey mustard never makes the cut of basic necessities.

This is a big one. I call it, The Peanut Butter Complex. I never grew up with peanut butter in my home. It had been years since I've even eaten a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. I can't put my finger on it but for some reason, I had to have it even more so when I was in Italy. I drove my roomies crazy. They'd roll their eyes at me and say, "ANCORAAAA con questo penoo bahre?" -"It's just peanut butter" my roomies would tell me over and over.

It doesn't matter... I have it now that I'm back and I'm thinking a peanut butter and banana sandwich is the way to go for breakfast right about now.

ciao.

Smart Car

2007-05-22T09:10:00.000-03:00

I'm not sure if this is old news or not, but I just heard this morning that the Smart car will be making it's way over to the USA and I'm not so sure how I feel about that. Sure - I may be paying $3.35 per gallon for gas but is the Smart Car really the way to go?

I must admit I'm a bit apprehensive. The idea of a car the size of a golf cart driving alongside an Escalade makes me nervous. Go ahead and call me paranoid but a small fender-bender-accident on the autostrada would crunch this car like a soda can.

I dont' think people should drive this car without a helmut. But that's just me.

I suppose having a Smart Car in the city would be beneficial for finding parking and cutting down on pollution. Other than that, I can't see what else it would be good for other than a laugh.

I was tempted to take a picture my last day in Castel Gandolfo of me, posed alongside a Smart Car with my suitcase...the car was only slightly larger than my suitcase...but then I decided not to embarass myself too much.

I couldn't help but laugh for the first few days in Italy at all the miniscule cars on the tiny roads weeving in and out of traffic (and pedestrians for that matter)...

I'm not knocking Smart Cars. I do think our cars are much too big. Coming back from Italy, it took me a while to not compare most of the cars around here to big boats. What is it with people around here thinking the bigger the better of everything and anything? Errr...don't answer that.

I couldn't resist taking this foto. I wanted to just pick up the car and put it in my pocket for a souvenir or something.

They are kind of cute in a toy matchbox car sort of way. I took this picture while sitting on a hilltop with my friends from Sydney. We were supposed to be somewhere following some sort of program for the day but we were watching a game of calcio instead. I like to challenge the rules and see how much I can get away with. ;-)

Home is where the heart is...

2007-05-21T11:14:00.001-03:00

I'm having one of those days. The one where I wake up and stare at my ceiling wondering what in the hell I'm doing back here, in this place I call "home" ... I'm missing my apartment in the upper right corner of that small house embedded in the tuscan hills. I miss waking up at the crack of dawn because of those bloody galline across the road wouldn't shutup. I miss stepping out of bed onto the cold, tile floor, walking over to my window to open the shutters and look out on a glorious view of vineyards, olive groves, mountains and a distant church.

I look at this picture and I'm tempted to reach my hand out - as if some sort of portal would open up. One that would let me step through it to just be transported to another time and place.

It's odd to feel so out of place when surrounded by people I've known my entire life. This is my home (for now)- I keep on telling myself, "There's no place like home." .... I wonder if Dorothy ever missed Oz after her whole adventure. How does one return to Kansas anymore after knowing such a beautiful place exists? I'm not necessarily comparing Oz to Italy. Italy had it's moments.

But is it possible to have homesickness of a place that isn't really home? Truth is, I felt more at home over there with a group of foreign room-mates, than I do here.

Just don't tell my papá. He can be a bit dramatic... I'm thinking it's more of a southern Italian thing. When my oldest brother finally decided to pick up and move into his own apartment at 30, my father was overcome with such confusion.

for example:

Brother: "Pa, I found an apartment and I'm movin' out this Saturday."

Papá: "Wha? Whadda you meana you move outta dis saturday? Why? You no like here?"

Me: "How about because he's THIRTY and it's ABOUT TIME he moves out of the basement papá!?" Honestly now.

I think all Italians have this contract that their baby boy "signs" once born...That's why they take baby's fingerprints. They just put the kid's finger print by the line marked with an 'X' saying that this child will agree to being babied until they're at least 30, will eat and love mom's pasta, visit nonna every sunday and worship the ground their father walks on, wear a gold chain with a crucifix, etc. etc... I could go on but I don't want to judge...

The funny things some people do.

2007-05-19T22:17:00.001-03:00

I like people. I'm no social butterfly or anything but I'm a people person. I tend to watch people when I go out. Not in a stalker, freaky way though. I sit on the train and most times I have a book I can read. But I prefer to read people instead. I usually just look around and make up whole life stories of men and women. I wonder where they're going, if they have a family...If I'm really curious, I may just get the nerve to ask them straight up, "Where are you going?" If they get nervous that I'll follow them, I reverse it and say, "Ok, fine, where are you coming from?" I've had great conversations that way. I've spoken about recipes, weather, far away places, cars, animals, ways to remove stains and many other random things.

It's surprising how we walk around and come face to face with hundreds of people in a day and not be the least bit curious as to who they are. I suppose one could walk down a hallway or along a sidewalk and not make eye contact with those we pass by. But would it kill you to smile? Why do people look to the pavement when another person approaches and walks passed? What's the worst that could happen?

I went out to dinner one night with a friend some time ago and noticed a few odd things that people do...

Why do people feel the need to keep their cell phone on the table? I find it rude and unnecessary. Do they really think they're that popular? I'll give them the benefit of the doubt - maybe they're waiting for an important call. Perhaps, new parents expecting a call from the babysitter.

Unless of course, there could be the couple where one of them is expecting the date to go terribly wrong and is too chicken to go through with the "I'm sorry but I don't think this is going to work out, but thanks anyway" speech. So they set up a typical scenario where a friend calls them 20 minutes into dinner and comes up with some lame excuse of an emergency... like, the family cat is missing or something...

Why do women go to bathrooms in groups? Aah, yes, it's the question with no explanation. I suppose there is no REAL answer. But am I less of a woman if I DO NOT travel to the toilet with 4 other friends in tow? There are plenty of other places to talk rather than the toilet as far as I'm concerned. I can't hold converations through the stalls. The very image of someone carrying on a conversation while sitting on a toilet just freaks me out. Finish your business - then come and talk to me, k? Whatever you'd like to talk about, I'm sure it can wait another 40 seconds. Where did this whole notion of having "meetings" in the restroom come into practice? Does anything good ever come out of it?

In junior high and high school, girls did 3 things in the bathroom:

1. Put on make up

2. Talk about boys

3. Smoke cigarettes (because it was forbidden to smoke on school property and so the only place to hide a smoke was in the bathroom)

Later on, in college,

both 1 + 2 ( I mean both from the list above and literally number one and two...), cigarettes would be smoked outside, and occassionally you'd have a couple getting frisky in the last stall.

**WHY on EARTH these people would do it in the bathroom of all places is BEYOND comprehension... as if it were romantic? ... makes for a great story to tell the kids doesn't it? ... Can't they just mosey on over to the periodical section of the library and do it there?

Speaking of the library, the one on campus just got remodelled after about 50 years. Now everything is all high tech with computer desks set up and they rearranged everything. I walked in, looked around and thought to myself, "Umm... where the hell are all the books?" And yet they still call it a library....

An interesting conecpt...

2007-05-18T09:59:00.000-03:00

I haven't been able to post lately since I've been a bit busy this week. Ancora sto cercando per una job (anything at this point) and continually offering my time to working on writing lyrics to a song that needs to be performed this coming Sunday up in Harlem. There will be a big gathering of people, Christians alongside Muslims, men and women... Encounters of Universal Brotherhood it's called. I'm all for breaking down walls, not help create them.

And so a few of my friends and I have been having meetings to come up with something really special where the muslim youth and christian youth can have a choir. Penso che sará un regalo speciale per tutti presente...e i giovani possono essere a symbol of how the next generation is willing to continue building bridges between faiths. So far it's coming along great!

Finalmente, potevo avere una copy of the full CD I was a part of my last day in Rome. Fico muito feliz to hear my friends' happy voices singing in harmony and was amazed by the finished product, knowing all the hard work people put into it and all... it's my new favorite cd!

Dopo il incontro in Harlem, I met up with a few other friends for dinner downtown and we spoke of the choir and music in general. Uno degli miei amici che giá ha sentito il cd, had NO IDEA che c'era una canzione con la mia voce. Era TROPPO funny per me quando lui ha realizzato...

On the other hand, it was NOT so funny quando i miei hanno sentito il cd. They were not so pleased with the CD, as far as I could tell. Non interessano da queste cose and sometimes I wonder why I try at all. But as my friend in Sydney was nice enough to remind me - I try because I love them. "Oh yeah," lo dico a me stessa - I do. That's why I try so hard...i guess.

Non vedo l'ora per domenica! People scratch their heads wondering what in the world whites, blacks, christians, and muslims have in common. Umm... we're people? Or how about an interesting concept: Siamo ONE FAMILY with the same creator?? It's just a thought but for some reason, it's not so natural to think about for others. But me and my friends like to challenge people to think about it.

...I'll let you know how it goes...

il problema con il regalo...ergh!

2007-05-14T11:08:00.000-03:00

The whole house was still sleeping off all the home-made wine we practically drowned ourselves in from Saturday night at dinner.

In spite of the killer headache I had when I woke up, I still managed to pull myself out of bed extra early on Sunday to set up the table and prepare everything thinking we could have a nice family breakfast on Mother's Day... did we even have pancake mix? - I thought as I'm sleep walking to the kitchen! YES! Thankfully we did. But we didn't have any milk. So I wake the youngest of my brothers up and ask if he'll go to the store (a quarter of a mile away) for the milk. Clearly, that was a waste of my time. I then go to ask my sister...an even BIGGER waste of my time... Great. Just great. I'm off to a good start.

I ran to the store all annoyed, got the milk for the pancake batter and came home. I read the directions on the back of the pancake box and it said, "JUST ADD WATER" ... figures.

After breakfast, everyone suddenly remembers they've got stuff to do and like a good little girl I get to clean up... that is, in fact, what I'm programmed to do is it not? Afterall, i'm the youngest girl in a Sicilian house hold...riiiiight.

After visiting nonna, my parents and I went for a stroll on the Bklyn Promenade in the afternoon. My sister (la principessa) was nice enough to come in from the city for the weekend and grace us with her presence. She bought my mother a beautiful plant for mother's day. (Did I mention my mom is a plant killer?) My oldest brother stopped by and brought her flowers. My youngest brother couldn't even be bothered to buy a gallon of milk on mother's day (Pero lui sará sempre il little angelo none the less...) And my other brother in Florida - not to be out done by the rest of his siblings - had BEST BUY deliver a big screen TV.... isn't that what every mother wants for mother's day? My papá was all like, "Oooh, bello questo regalo! Ma veramente very bello!" No doubt he's thinking of all the Juventus games he'll be watching...

Now my younger brother is convinced it would be a shame to watch regular TV on a 50" screen and we just have to get cable now... as if it's such a tragedy to have five channels now a days!! ??

It's all down hill from here folks. We now have more television sets than we do people living in this house...Che vergogna!!

Call me traditional but I don't think TV really promotes a sense of a "family atmosphere" if each family member is in their own room watching their own program. Am I the only person who sees the potential PROBLEM here?? What kind of 20-something year old am I if I can't appreciate 500 channels you ask? One who sees the desperate need for us to get off our asses and have decent conversations with eachother (instead of gossiping about who disrespected who in the family) or actually DOING something together instead of being hypnotized by television. I could go on but I'll step on my soap box in a later post.

PS - on a good note - I found out my cousin is pregnant AND I'll be in another cousin's bridal party under the condition that I don't go and get pregnant before her wedding....but afterwards, I'm okay right? ;P

Mama's Day

2007-05-11T11:00:00.000-03:00

Mother's Day is coming fast! Why am I beginning to think about this thing only now? It's one of those Hallmark Holidays that just creeps up on you. When did this whole thing begin and do I really need to fall into the whole marketing hype of that day? (Don't answer that) Flowers, special dinner, card, gifts...desserts!

Not to sound insensitive and I know this is going to but - shouldn't we be celebrating this everyday? Most people think that's a sad excuse for people not to do anything. I'm not sure how I feel about the whole thing. Can't we surprise her by making an ordinary Tuesday into something fab? Not that I do though, so I guess Sunday would be as good a day to do something nice. I'm freakin nice to begin with though.

I'm thinking of what I would expect if I were a mom - which most likely won't be happening for a good 10 years so it doesn't really matter (because y'all know how gung-ho I am about living the present moment)... All I know is that I'm going to be the coolest mom..... Of course... that's what they all say don't they? :-)

But back to mom - she already HAS EVERYTHING. What more can she receive? I got her a waffle iron last year because that's what she "wanted" ... We've used it maybe TWICE? ... how badly did she want it then? Or maybe she wanted it not so that SHE could use it but so that WE could use it FOR HER... which she shoulda mentioned that to begin with.

...I'm thinking more along the lines of bringing her breakfast in bed this year... waffles anyone?

Globe trotter...

2007-05-07T12:08:00.000-03:00

Wooohoo! Ho finito il semestre! FINALMENTE! Adesso devo pensare come posso avere abbastanza soldi per andare in Argentina e Costa Rica quest'estate.... hmm... any ideas? I realize I just got back from Italy but that was months ago people! My feet are never firmly planted on the same soil for too long...and NO, I'm NOT running from the FBI!

I know I'm getting a bit ahead of myself here but seeing as how today is the last day of the semester, I can't help but think of my plans for the summer. No matter how hypothetical they may be.

Miei genitori ancora non sanno che I have an amazing opportunity to go to Buenos Aires for una settimana in luglio to be a representative of all the North East zone of USA for a PanAmerican congress of young adults dedicated to making a difference in this world... There, I would get to participate in discussions, learn about the actions I can take in my own community and meet youth from all over parts of Central, and South America.... looks like I'll need to brush up on my Spanish! Hola guapo!

...but the whole Buenos Aires thing is still very much up in the air... Ieri stavo cercando per biglietti...I was just curious! There's one with a 9 and a half hour lay over in Sao Paolo, Brasil and it's about $150 cheaper too. I'LL TAKE IT! Avevo conosciuto un sacco di brasiliani in italia (go figures) and I'm hoping to see them again - even if for only a fraction of a day! Then I'll be able to find me a gauchinho of my very own!! ;) Sim, agora falo em portuges...agradeca a cada uma mis meninas! Eu estou com muita vontade de ir e to morrendo com saudades do mis amigos!!! Nao sei o que vou fazer!

I'm praying this will work out! Ma chi sá la volonta di Dio...Even if the plans don't go through, I'm willing to accept that God wants it that way - so who am I to argue huh?

Costa Rica is an entirely different story. I'm the maid of honor for my best friend's wedding which is taking place on a glorious Costa Rican playa... so, naturalmente, andró. --sigh--

mamma mia, la mia vita e' troppo dura...

Shout and Sing!

2007-05-06T18:34:00.000-03:00

Once upon a time, long, long ago, in a far away land, a girl who only ever sings in her shower and car got an opportunity to sing in front of an international crowd of thousands with a live feed transmitting all over the world. The very next day, this girl got a chance to sing and record a few Christian songs with some friends and well, if you haven't figured it out by now, that girl is ME.
I just got a phone call (while sitting in the library) from a friend from Chicago whose voice can also be heard on the CD since she was livin it up in Italy with me for all those months, who had just received a message from this guy Vincenzo in Italy, who also worked on the CD...
...before this gets any more complicated, what I'm trying to say here is that the CD is out and here's the link to listen to two songs and sample to "Love Builds Peace", you'll be hearing a familiar voice... http://www.myspace.com/shoutandsing
and for those of you who are aware of the process it took to make this CD and the people involved, you'll hear a few friends' voices on that song as well as the others too! It's so exciting!

It's taking every ounce of my being NOT to play this thing to hear it right now since I'm in the library's computer lab and I refuse to do what I've been complaining that other people have been doing for about the past 2 weeks...
*for the record, I get no cut from this CD what so ever...I was just having a blast mixin it up! The proceeds go to-
a) pay for the cost in making the cd -- and --
b) the rest go into charity ... (Project Africa?) I'll get back to y'all on that one since we're affiliated with so many different projects out there.

------
Actually, I DID end up hearing these songs since I got a call on my cell phone just now from a friend in Sydney, Australia and she was kind enough to hold the phone to her speakers...we ain't half bad either!

...God bless technology eh?

Long lost cousin

2007-05-06T11:55:00.000-03:00

One of my favorite scenes from Mio Grasso, Grosso, Greco Matrimonio is when "Ian" admits to having only two cousins. Surely there are other funny moments in this film...but the thought of having just two cousins amazes me.

Just the other weekend I went to pick up my mom at my cousin's bridal shower in Staten Island. Ah yes, Staten Island... home to a different breed of Italians. Just think "Sopranos" with filthy polluted air. Italians are pretty similar no matter where you go. But those on S.I are a whole different story. I'm thinkin it's because of all the fumes from the dumps or something in the water that makes them the way they are....sorry, that was pretty mean.

So I walk into the over-the-top, disgustingly elaborate guido palace where this thing is taking place and find my mom in the midst of a whole slew of middle aged Italian women wearing what looks like something they most likely pulled out of their daughters' closets. My mom grabs my arm and pulls me through to meet the bride... my "cousin" - i use the term lightly. I don't even know this chick. She's the daughter of my mother's cousin and I've met her only once in my life. I congratulate her on her engagement and after thanking me she then patronizes me on how big I've gotten and how grown up I am. And I'm standing there thinking, "No shit, it's been 20 years since I've see you and excuse me, aren't you like, 3 years older than I am??" My mom was just smitten seeing the two of us together. As if we were going to be best friends now? Then I turn around and see this other girl and lo and behold, she's also my cousin. The bride's sister. She has no clue who I am and I can honestly say that I never even knew this girl existed. She looks me up and down and tells me, "I never would've been able to pick you out of a crowd." And then my mom proceeds to point out the family resemblance... I think she may have had one too many drinks at the party...

Then when we're leaving I tell my mom how awkward that whole situation was for me and she yells, "WHY? But you're FAMILY! She's your COUSIN!" ... mmmk ma, you just don't get it.

Honestly, I have too many cousins to count but am I obligated to love them ALL???!

I'm just as LOST as you are...

2007-05-05T22:48:00.000-03:00

LOST was my favorite show until I went over seas and lived in a small rustic apartment with no TV, cable, internet, or phone for like 5 months. ...and yes, I had electricity.

So basically, once I got back to the states after last season, I found it nearly impossible to catch up. I'm done with the whole thing really. How on earth do they find some cellar underground full of Pottery Barn furniture and Pier 1 candles, fully stocked with Frosted Flakes and peanut butter? For crying out loud people, I realize it's TV Land and anything goes but they even have golf clubs... and don't tell me that the reason why these girls seem to have a different outfit each time is because all the rest of the luggage washed ashore from the plane crash... i'm not buying into it. I wonder where they'll find all the maternity clothes?? There's got to be a Main St. on the other side of the island with a boutique or something right?! They even have a hospital-like operation room as well as baby machine equipment? Are you freegin kidding me here?

Truth is, I feel so much more free now that I'm not obsessed with it. LOST is the type of show where you seriously CAN NOT miss one episode or else, well... you're lost. Who wants to be a slave to some TV SHOW?!! I gave up!

Even my dad is hooked on it!! But you can't ever watch the show with him... he talks too much... he even asks ME why shit happens or what something might mean. First of all - i'm NOT the one to ask since I'm too lost with it... and secondly, I really don't give a damn.

But I will say this- If I were stuck on that island with Sawyer... well...hmm... now we're talkin...

The hair cut

2007-05-05T19:03:00.000-03:00

The last time I got a hair cut was in Italy by my Colombian friend with a pair of rusty scissors and no professional experience in a multi-purpose laundry room. ...just your ordinary saturday right? We were having a whole lot of laughs...good times...God I miss that girl. Today is her birthday and I'm especially thinking of her. It's ironic how I'm cutting my hair on this day...
I have had the same person cut my hair for the last 15 years and the fact that I trusted someone who I had only known for 4 months was a MAJOR thing for me. But hey, I think it came out great! But since I've been back, I've decided to go for someone new... break away from the other person I went to... time for new beginnings! So....
I'm getting a hair cut today and at the risk of sounding like a cheeseball, I think I might cry. There won't be any ghetto make-shift salon where I could sit on top of a washing machine and then sweep up the hair with a ghetto broom that doesn't really pick up anything...there won't be a window to look out over a glorious tuscan country side with mountains that look as though God himself, painted them on a beautiful sky blue canvas...

--sigh--
Invece, I'll be in a cutting edge salon in NY with a new stylist.... I'll sit and wait in front of bizzare collections of magazines plastered with provocative images of so-called beauty. I'll then sit in a professional chair and attempt to strike up a conversation on something that matters.
It's nice to think of old memories every now and then... so long as they don't hold you back. It's nice to remember... I'll always remember - but I'll try to live the present moment better. I haven't even stepped foot out of my house and I'm already envisioning some terribly mundane scene at the salon. How am I supposed to go ahead when I've already given up on the present moment? Ricomincio...

... e la vita continua...

My Zia- La Gazzetta...

2007-05-04T09:34:00.000-03:00

I got an email from a good friend of mine out in L.A and she's telling me she's doing the 5K Run on May 12 for the Revlon Run/Walk for Cancer. I'm so proud of her! At this point in time I'm unable to participate but it's something that gets me thinking of how I can be more of an altruistic person and get myself out there. I currently am doing things for Youth for United World which is affiliated with the Focolare Movement but I want to do more!
The other morning I woke up pretty early. I accidentally left the alarm on and initially I was upset with myself since I wanted to sleep more but I heard something really cool about an interesting organization. Onebrick.org - it gives people more opportunities to get together and give a hand to other great organizations! Love it! The way I see it, God must have wanted me to hear this or else I would have remembered to switch off the alarm.

...my parents get so annoyed when I talk about volunteering my time to a worthy cause... then it gets me thinking: what's wrong with this picture here? For crying out loud, it's not as though they have a promiscuous daughter with a drug addiction and failing out of college! What do I have to do to get their approval?!

But in trying to understand their twisted logic, I guess what they're saying is for me to get a "real job." ...they don't see how I can do work and not have the urge to walk up to the person in charge and demand money for my efforts. It's just "unnatural" they tell me. So I'll have to find a good paying job soon or they'll go crazy.

Yes, I see it now. Then my mom can have something to talk about with my aunts and the other italian ladies of the neighborhood. Of course all she would have to do is call Zia and then the whole world would know... I call her "La Gazzetta" because her brain is like one of those electronic message boards in Times Square where the information just keeps going and going... I love my Zia but God does she not know how to keep information private!

Any scandalous information on who's dating who or who's not talking to that person because of some stupid so-called "disrespectful" action is front page news...and don't think for a minute that she stays quiet for very long. Within an hour, anyone connected to this elaborate network of italians knows every intricate detail... except the chances of my aunt knowing all the details are slim. And so the saga continues to travel across the ocean into a little fisherman's town on the sea. Then the real kicker: when you eventually DO go to this town for the summer (and it could be years later) ... the inhabitants of this town remember it - and boy do they get the whole story dead wrong.

God Bless Brooklyn

2007-05-03T14:09:00.000-03:00

I want to know the politician who thought this was an acceptable way to spend our tax dollars....and then buy him a drink and ask if we can make another one saying, "Freegin-A! Come back!" and put it somewhere...

A.D.D much?

2007-04-29T15:50:00.000-03:00

Hello folks, still in the library and thankfully, there hasn't been any major problems with IPOD's and talkative girls... BUT - You're going to think I'm a total spaz ... I was doing just fine and typing up a storm on White Collar Crime until this guy sat next to me and now I can't concentrate - not because he's distractingly good looking and cute or anything (please, I'm not that lucky) but because he's breathing really really loudly and it's not as if I can tell him to keep it down. For goodness sake, what can I do - tell him to stop breathing?

Bilingual babbling...

2007-04-28T16:59:00.000-03:00

...Taking a break from typing up this term paper & ho appena realizzato che posso scrivere questa cosa in some other color. La prossima volta che vengo qui - porteró cibo o qualcosa per fare merenda. Seriously, my stomach is killing me! Posso mangiare un cavallo!!
I've been in this computer lab per 6 ore now & non ti posso dire how much I just love this place. L'amo cosi TANTO che I'm coming back domani mattina- first.thing.
Sará finito May 7, I keep telling myself. Then I can avoid anything that remotely looks like it can be found in this institution- such as you know, paper, pencils, books. Not like I'd find that at work or anything....

Stressed

2007-04-27T18:05:00.000-03:00

I apologize in advance as it seems I'm having a bit of a meltdown...
It's the week before finals and I've got loads of papers to type up yet I sit here creating this blog. After all this time in college you'd think I knew how to manage my time better and get my priorities straight. I'm sacrificing precious time posting my first blog rather than a paper on Prostitution. Lovely. Thank goodness my sicilian parents don't ask me what I'm learning in college!
I came to the library figuring I'd be able to concentrate better since I get so easily distracted at home. The urge to get up and eat, watch a little TV, talk on the phone is so in my face when I'm home. To make matters worse, the family computer is not ideally located. It's in the kitchen where my loud, sicilian family likes to gather. So any chance of me concentrating is slim to none.
...which is why i'm in the library on campus. You'd think things would be a little better here. I've got SERIOUS problems with people and their IPODs in the computer labs. Can't these people see I'm trying to type a freegin blog here? Ironically, I find my stress levels increase whenever I'm here. I go crazy with rude, loud people. Don't get me wrong - i'm loud and crazy too. BUT, there's a time and place for everything and dammit, it's finals week!
I stumbled across and old email I had sent out years ago to a good friend, during finals week, when I was ready to have a major melt down right there in the computer lab.
This is how I began the letter-

Definition of stress: The confusion created when one's mind overrides the body's desire to beat or choke the living shit out of some asshole who desperately needs it.

I thought that was perfect. Especially for that girl who won't stop popping her gum, or the other girl in the corner who doesn't know how to whisper on her cell phone, or the punk with the headphones blaring...

I know I sound a little hostile right now but I swear I'm really a nice person. Honest.... and I don't normally curse like that either.